One of the good things about fathers is that they aren’t mothers. They have their own distinct role — to multiply your baby’s intelligence — you need both parents.
Father is wonderful because he won’t do things for his child that he knows perfectly well his child can do and should do for himself. He has a hard-nosed respect for his child’s ability that no one else has. This unqualified respect is a precious commodity. Children respond to it as they respond to nothing else.
Another reason that father is wonderful is that he has not altogether lost his concept of time.
Douglas and Noah take a dip in the pool
Mother lives between the adult world of “there is never enough time” and the kid world of “there is all the time in the world”. When these two worlds meet, chaos ensues. This is the universe in which mother tries to marry “no time” with “all the time in the world”. This is a kind of Never-Never-Land.
In Father’s world, “time is short”, “time is money” and “there is no time like the present”.
When it comes to carrying out a child’s physical program, father doesn’t just do it – he attacks it. How many mothers benignly complain that their husbands can get the physical program done in half the time that they do?
Jake and Dad build a time line with Janet Doman for the parents attending the How To Multiply Your Baby’s Intelligence course.
For fathers “there is no time like the present” – this is the no nonsense factor. If it is going to get done with father, it gets done right now or not at all.
Mothers are models of adaptability. They learn how to adapt their bodies for nine months to accommodate the baby. They learn how to share their body to feed the baby. They learn how to go without sleep, and often food, to care for the baby. They are masters of “adapt and handle”.
The good thing about fathers is that they are often models of rigidity. They do not adapt to the baby – at least not to the degree that mother does. Father is wonderful at teaching the child how to adapt to him.
When a child is problem-solving with Mother, Mother often finds herself running around the house to get each thing needed to solve the problem while the child waits, sometimes impatiently. Then, more often than not, Mother finds herself actually doing that part of the problem-solving that is tedious or uninteresting for the child while she saves the interesting parts for the child to do himself. Mother permits the child to be in the driver’s seat and acts as a careful navigator so that all goes well — a different approach than father uses to multiply your baby’s intelligence.
When a child is problem-solving with father, however, father doesn’t budge. Instead, the child runs all over the house to get any tools or materials that are needed. Then father allows the child to do the repetitive actions and generally permits the child to watch him while he does the critical actions. Father puts the child in the role of the apprentice and then ensures that the end result is good by doing the difficult parts himself.
Ethan and dad are a good team
The child is just as thrilled with this arrangement with father as he is with working with Mother
The child quickly learns that mother will give him the opportunity to lead and shape his own destiny while Father teaches him how to adapt and follow directions. Little children are brilliant – they need and want both lessons.
Dads are great coaches
The Good Lord and Mother Nature certainly had a fine idea when they invented Fathers.
One of the best things about fathers is that they are not mothers. They provide the perfect counterbalance for mothers.
We have often said that mothers make the best mothers, but we should also add that fathers make the very best fathers.
On the worst moment of their worst day, mother and father will do better with their child than anyone else will.
On the best moment of their best day, they will prove that mother and father, together with their children, make the most tender, tough and admirable union that there is or ever has been.